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annotate etc/condom.1 @ 96708:ceb7b0d5c55f
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author | Glenn Morris <rgm@gnu.org> |
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date | Wed, 16 Jul 2008 02:49:35 +0000 |
parents | 23a1cea22d13 |
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rev | line source |
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25852 | 1 CONDOM(1) EUNUCH Programmer's Manual CONDOM(1) |
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5 NAME | |
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6 condom - Protection against viruses and prevention of child |
25852 | 7 processes |
8 | |
9 SYNOPSIS | |
10 condom [options] [processid] | |
11 | |
12 DESCRIPTION | |
13 _condom_ provides protection against System Transmitted | |
14 Viruses (STVs) that may invade your system. Although the spread of | |
15 such viruses across a network can only be abated by aware and cautious | |
16 users, _condom_ is the only highly-effective means of preventing | |
17 viruses from entering your system (see celibacy(1)). Any data passed | |
18 to _condom_ by the protected process will be blocked, as specified by | |
19 the value of the -s option (see OPTIONS below). _condom_ is known to | |
20 defend against the following viruses and other malicious | |
21 afflictions... | |
22 | |
23 o AIDS | |
24 o Herpes Simplex (genital varieties) | |
25 o Syphilis | |
26 o Crabs | |
27 o Genital warts | |
28 o Gonorrhea | |
29 o Chlamydia | |
30 o Michelangelo | |
31 o Jerusalem | |
32 | |
33 When used alone or in conjunction with pill(1), sponge(1), | |
34 foam(1), and/or setiud(3), _condom_ also prevents the conception of a | |
35 child process. If invoked from within a synchronous process, _condom_ | |
36 has, by default, an 80% chance of preventing the external processes | |
37 from becoming parent processes (see the -s option below). When other | |
38 process contraceptives are used, the chance of preventing a child | |
39 process from being forked becomes much greater. See pill(1), | |
40 sponge(1), foam(1), and setiud(3) for more information. | |
41 If no options are given, the current user's login process (as | |
42 determined by the environment variable USER) is protected with a | |
43 Trojan rough-cut latex condom without a reservoir tip. The optional | |
44 'processid' argument is an integer specifying the process to protect. | |
45 NOTE: _condom_ may only be used with a hard disk. _condom_ | |
46 will terminate abnormally with exit code -1 if used with a floppy | |
47 disk (see DIAGNOSTICS below). | |
48 | |
49 OPTIONS | |
50 The following options may be given to _condom_... | |
51 | |
52 -b BRAND BRANDs are as follows... | |
53 | |
54 trojan (default) | |
55 ramses | |
56 sheik | |
57 goldcoin | |
58 fourex | |
59 | |
60 -m MATERIAL The valid MATERIALs are... | |
61 | |
62 latex (default) | |
63 saranwrap | |
64 membrane -- WARNING! The membrane option is _not_ | |
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65 endorsed by the System Administrator General as an |
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66 effective barrier against certain viruses. It is |
25852 | 67 supported only for the sake of tradition. |
68 | |
69 -f FLAVOR The following FLAVORs are currently supported... | |
70 | |
71 plain (default) | |
72 apple | |
73 banana | |
74 cherry | |
75 cinnamon | |
76 licorice | |
77 orange | |
78 peppermint | |
79 raspberry | |
80 spearmint | |
81 strawberry | |
82 | |
83 -r Toggle reservoir tip (default is no reservoir tip) | |
84 | |
85 -s STRENGTH STRENGTH is an integer between 20 and 100 specifying | |
86 the resilience of _condom_ against data passed to | |
87 _condom_ by the protected process. Using a larger | |
88 value of STRENGTH increases _condom_'s protective | |
89 abilities, but also reduces interprocess communication. | |
90 A smaller value of STRENGTH increases interprocess | |
91 communication, but also increases the likelihood of a | |
92 security breach. An extremely vigorous process or | |
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93 one passing an enormous amount of data to _condom_ |
25852 | 94 will increase the chance of _condom_'s failure. The |
95 default STRENGTH is 80%. | |
96 | |
97 -t TEXTURE Valid TEXTUREs are... | |
98 | |
99 rough (default) | |
100 ribbed | |
101 bumps | |
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102 lubricated (provides smoother interaction between |
25852 | 103 processes) |
104 | |
105 WARNING: The use of an external application to _condom_ in | |
106 order to reduce friction between processes has been proven in | |
107 benchmark tests to decrease _condom_'s strength factor! If execution | |
108 speed is important to your process, use the '-t lubricated' option. | |
109 | |
110 DIAGNOSTICS | |
111 _condom_ terminates with one of the following exit codes... | |
112 | |
113 -1 An attempt was made to use _condom_ on a floppy disk. | |
114 | |
115 0 _condom_ exited successfully (no data was passed to | |
116 the synchronous process). | |
117 | |
118 1 _condom_ failed and data was allowed through. The | |
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119 danger of transmission of an STV or the forking of a child |
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120 process is inversely proportional to the number of other |
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121 protections employed and is directly proportional to |
25852 | 122 the ages of the processes involved. |
123 | |
124 BUGS | |
125 _condom_ is NOT 100% effective at preventing a child process | |
126 from being forked or at deterring the invasion of a virus (although | |
127 the System Administrator General has deemed that _condom_ is the most | |
128 effective means of preventing the spread of system transmitted | |
129 viruses). See celibacy(1) for information on a 100% effective program | |
130 for preventing these problems. | |
131 Remember... the use of sex(1) and other related routines | |
132 should only occur between mature, consenting processes. If you must | |
133 use sex(1), please employ _condom_ to protect your process and your | |
134 synchronous process. If we are all responsible, we can stop the | |
135 spread of STVs. | |
136 | |
137 AUTHORS and HISTORY | |
138 The original version of _condom_ was released in Roman times | |
139 and was only marginally effective. With the advent of modern | |
140 technology, _condom_ now supports many more options and is much more | |
141 effective. | |
142 The current release of _condom_ was written by Ken Maupin at | |
143 the University of Washington (maupin@cs.washington.edu) and was last | |
144 updated on 10/7/92. | |
145 | |
146 SEE ALSO | |
147 celibacy(1), sex(1), pill(1), sponge(1), foam(1), and | |
148 setiud(3) |